alone in a crowd

have you ever been somewhere so full of intelligent, competent, sociable people,
that you feel like you have nothing to contribute?

have you ever felt alone in a sea of bodies,
wondering if friends are out there?

yeah.
me too.
it's a lonely, vulnerable place to be.

but the thing about this place full of people,
is that God provides.

He gently reminds us we are qualified to be where we have been called

He guides us to those painful memories, gently whispering that no one else can tell our story

He walks into the new, unknown, unexpected moments filling us with the peace that passes all understanding

I'm learning that when we ask,
God will give us our daily bread,
not leaving us alone in a crowd.  

flying into unknown

Right now I sit on an airplane, leaving my home and community to attend university across the country. 

The plane is bumpy, and I know my future might be also, contrary to what I’d like to believe. 

My heart aches thinking about the community I leave behind, and my family that will fly back in a few days. 

But I leave full of confidence, knowing God has called me to this school, and I rest in the truth that he controls the unknown. 

I remember my identity is not found in the things of this earth, but in Jesus Christ and his death and resurrection. 

And I pray that I would be filled with all strength, courage, and peace as I fly into the clouds, not sure what the ground looks like

A tear filled prayer

Oh Lord oh Lord 

I cry from the depths of my being, 

A full, deep, hollowing pain. 

Oh Lord how my soul hurts 

I weep. 

I weep at the sadness and depression that overtook another life. 

I weep for the pain and despair that must have been felt. 

I weep. 

Suicide took a 16 year old girl last week.

Lies prevailed. 

Shock has left its origin and began to ripple about our town. 

And we cry out,

“Oh Lord, be near in the darkness. 

Be our anchor in this wind. 

Teach us that beauty will rise from ashes. 

For you are the only comfort this world has to offer. 

You are the hope that is unseen. 

You wrote the end of the story. 

So Jesus, please be near in the wake of this incomprehensible trauma. 

Cover your world in peace. 

And write your story across our very beings.’

Amen.